Curiosity... it's my newest mindfulness tool.
When I signed up for my first mindfulness class, my goal was to learn how to never have another challenging feeling again. I truly believed that I could learn how to rise above annoyance, injustice, and anger. Now I understand how this goal is the exact opposite of mindfulness.
Mindfulness is awareness. It's allowing yourself to feel your feels. It's observing what is happening in your mind and body.
This week, I saw a post that triggered feelings of anger. I so badly wanted to reach out to the poster and share all of the reasons that the information was flawed and unfair.
I let my mind sit with the challenging feelings for awhile because I know that "what you resist, persists." In my mind, I drafted what I thought was the perfect response to the post, felt where the anger was manifesting in my body, and just really allowed myself to feel all of the feels.
When the anger was no longer serving me, I decided to get curious about my feelings. Why was I so angry? What about this situation was truly triggering me? What was my unmet need?
And, then, I asked myself the most important question. "Given the givens, how can I be kind to myself?" This is called mindful self-compassion.
I gave myself a hug and said, "Of course you're upset. You're human. What was posted was untrue and unfair." I enjoyed the kindness I extended myself and the warmth of my hug (I give great hugs).
Giving myself permission to feel the feels, getting curious about the feels, and then offering myself compassion about the feels, allowed me to move forward.
Get curious. It's incredibly powerful. Namaste.